giovedì 3 marzo 2016

VICTORIAN ETIQUETTE: conversation rules.



The art of conversation consists in the exercise of two fine qualities. You must originate, and you must sympathize; you must possess at the same time the habit of communicating and of listening attentively.
 The union is rare but irresistible. 




A Conversation Piece, Solomon Joseph Solomon, 1884, Collection Leighton House Museum, London



L'arte della conversazione consiste nell'esercizio di due buone qualità: bisogna essere in  grado di cominciare un discorso e di mostrare comprensione; è necessario possedere allo stesso tempo l'abitudine di comunicare e di ascoltare con attenzione. 
Il possederle entrambe è raro, ma realmente irresistibile.


Queste le primissime righe con cui comincia a guidare i nostri Victorians nelle regole necessarie per una conversazione educata, accattivante ed elegante il The Ladies' Book of Etiquette, and Manual of Politeness -  A Complete Hand Book for the Use of the Lady in Polite Society, scritto da Florence Heartley ed edito nel 1860, che in XXVI capitoli stabiliva le principali norme necessarie affinché una Lady mostrasse in società il meglio di sé, e lo facesse con il più estremo buongusto.

Il capitolo I di tale corposo manuale è proprio dedicato alla conversazione, il primo modo in cui ci si presenta agli altri, il più delicato ed il più importante; esso enunciava le regole per guidare il discorso indispensabili ad una perfetta padrona di casa in occasione di un tè, ad una cena formale o qualora fosse stata ospite ad un ballo o ad un incontro galante, su di una carrozza pubblica o in una Coffee House.




  First Class. The Meeting ... and at First Meeting Loved (National Gallery of Canada, Ottawa) Abraham Solomon, (1824 -1862) 



Innanzitutto il galateo vittoriano stabiliva che la eccessiva confidenza nelle conversazioni in pubblico fosse da evitare anche tra marito e moglie i quali avrebbero dovuto rivolgersi l'un l'altro senza utilizzare appellativi o diminutivi a cui erano avvezzi tra le mura domestiche, usando piuttosto l'intero nome di battesimo; era inoltre considerato scortese dire 'Mrs. Colonel Smith' o 'Mrs. Sergeant Jones', così come lo era ripetere il titolo di una persona in una conversazione. Questo valeva anche per l'uso di "Sir", "Madam", "Mr," e "Mrs" ma vediamo nel dettaglio le altre regole dettate dall'etichetta al fine di evitare incidenti di galateo. 

Non bisognava mai proporre argomenti che costituissero motivo di dolore o sconforto per chi era presente e se, malauguratamente, ciò accadeva, era scorretto interrompere il discorso qualora di ciò ci si rendeva conto, ma bisognava tralasciare l'argomento per gradi cedendo magari il discorso ad un altro presente che si cercava di coinvolgere, perché va ricordato che era considerato estremamente scorretto l'essere protagonisti assoluti di ogni discorso; il galateo vietava, per correttezza, di interrompere chi stava parlando, ed anche qualora l'argomento che questi proponeva stimolava domande, era comunque necessario attendere che avesse terminato il suo discorso per porle.
Era buona norma parlare sempre con tono sostenuto, ma mai ad alta voce, trovando il giusto compromesso tra l'urlare ed il borbottio e non usare mai parole in francese od anche in spagnolo, pur in presenza di persone che padroneggiavano la lingua:

Ho sentito una signora citare una frase in spagnolo: aveva imparato una frase sola, ma un signore di Cuba, felice di incontrare un americano con cui poter conversare nella propria lingua, immediatamente si rivolse a lei in spagnolo. In preda all'imbarazzo ed alla vergogna ella fu costretta a confessare che la sua conoscenza della lingua era limitata a quella citazione.



Hush! (The Concert) - Jacques Joseph (James) Tissot, (1836 - 1902)




Era buona norma trascurare le carenze degli altri nel conversare, mai correggerli o far notare i loro errori, e, qualora la confidenza lo permetteva, lo si poteva fare in un secondo tempo in privato, ma non era facendo notare le pecche degli altri che si mostrava la propria saggezza, quanto piuttosto nella modestia che deve regnare sovrana su tutte le altre regole di vita. Se, d'altra parte, coloro con cui si conversava usavano parole o espressioni difficili da comprendere non era da esitare o mostrare vergogna per la propria ignoranza, ma era doveroso chiedere una spiegazione, ma  mai ci si doveva intromettere in conversazioni di tipo professionale che implicavano competenze specifiche, le quali erano da ascoltare in riverente silenzio.


In the Conservatory, Jacques Joseph (James) Tissot, (1836 - 1902)




Non bisognava mai screditare un amico assente o criticare l'abbigliamento od il modo di porsi di un presente, sarebbe stata pura meschinità, se poi questi godeva dell'ammirazione degli altri era buona norma lasciare che conservassero il loro parere in pace, anche perché a cadere in disistima, a quel punto, non sarebbe stato costui, ma voi stessi, apparendo di carattere invidioso e perfido; una Lady decorosa avrebbe inoltre evitato di far vertere la propria conversazione su qualsiasi argomento che avrebbe potuto indurre disgusto nel suo uditorio, come entrare nel dettaglio di talune malattie, di parassiti, di piante nocive, o di casi di sporcizia, non solo a tavola, ma in qualsiasi altro luogo, così come il galateo severamente condannava l'abitudine di usare frasi che ammettono di un doppio significato e la trattazione di argomenti di natura religiosa.



The Ball on Shipboard, Jacques Joseph (James) Tissot, (1836 - 1902)




Esprimendo un parere era da evitare la perentorietà ed affermare che una cosa "è così", ma era senz'altro più corretto e delicato esprimere la propria opinione come un parere dicendo: "Penso che questo sia così", o "queste sono le mie opinioni"; era considerata una buona regola per le young ladies quella di conversare con un signora che si conosce se in sala sono presenti dei gentlemen e di conversare con uno di loro se lo si gradisce, solo in presenza di numerose altre Ladies.



The Dinner Party, Jules-Alexandre Grün (1868 - 1928)




Infine, per essere in grado di conversare in modo appropriato e corretto, Florence Heartley riteneva necessario leggere molto facendo tesoro nella propria memoria di quanto si era letto, avere una rapida comprensione, osservare gli eventi che si avvicendavano al tempo, ovvero, essere aggiornati, e ascoltare con attenzione ogni volta che si fosse presentata l'occasione di acquisire una qualche conoscenza.


Too Early, Jacques Joseph (James) Tissot, (1836 - 1902)




Per concludere cito dalla pagina 12 del suddetto prestigioso 'HANDBOOK':



"Vorrei fissare, una sola grande regola generale per la conversazione, che è la seguente: le persone non dovrebbero mai parlare per compiacere se stesse, quanto piuttosto chi le ascolta. Questo dovrebbe indurle a pensare se ciò di cui parlano vale la pena di essere ascoltato, se ci sia o meno spirito o senso in ciò che si apprestano a dire, e se sia consono al momento, al luogo e alla persona cui si rivolgono."



Holiday, Jacques Joseph (James) Tissot, (1836 - 1902)




Certo è che in una società in grado di seguire alla lettera le norme che l'etichetta imponeva, il rispetto reciproco, la buona creanza, la mitezza di carattere e l'umiltà erano alla regola del giorno in qualsiasi ambiente ... 
.... ed ancora una volta mi trovo a provare rimpianto per essere nata nel secolo sbagliato !



Queen Victoria in Conversation with the Prince and Princess of Wales, Author’s Collection




Con sentito affetto e devozione vi ringrazio sinceramente per il sostegno, l'entusiasmo  e l'affetto di cui sempre più mi fate dono, 

a presto carissimi lettori ed amici 











FONTI BIBLIOGRAFICHE:

Florence Heartley, The Ladies' Book of Etiquette, and Manual of Politeness -  A Complete Hand Book for the Use of the Lady in Polite Society, G.W.COTTRELL PUBLISHER, Boston, 1860.



CITAZIONI:

1 - Florence Heartley, The Ladies' Book of Etiquette, and Manual of Politeness -  A Complete Hand Book for the Use of the Lady in Polite SocietyG.W.COTTRELL PUBLISHER, Boston, 1860, pag. 16.










The art of conversation consists in the exercise of two fine qualities. You must originate, and you must sympathize; you must possess at the same time the habit of communicating and of listening attentively.
 The union is rare but irresistible.





- picture 1 - A Conversation Piece, Solomon Joseph Solomon, 1884, Collection Leighton House Museum, London




These are the very first lines with which The Ladies' Book of Etiquette, and Manual of Politeness - A Complete Hand Book for the Use of the Lady in Polite Society, written by Florence Heartley and published in 1860, which established, along its XXVI  chapters, the necessary provisions to ensure a Lady to show the best of herself, and to do it with extreme good taste, begins to guide our Victorians in the rules necessary for a polite and attractive conversation.

The first chapter of this full-bodied manual is precisely devoted to conversation, the first way in which one presents to the others, surely the most delicate and the most important one; it enunciated the rules to guide the discourse essential to a perfect hostess at a tea, at a formal dinner or if she has been host to a dance or a gallant encounter, on a public carriage or in a Coffee House.




- picture 2 - First Class. The Meeting ... and at First Meeting Loved (National Gallery of Canada, Ottawa) Abraham Solomon, (1824 -1862) 




First of all, the Victorian etiquette stated that excessive confidence in public conversations was to be avoided even between husband and wife who were to contact each other without using nicknames or diminutives, to which they were accustomed at home, rather using their forename; was also considered impolite to say 'Mrs. Colonel Smith 'or' Mrs. Sergeant Jones', as it was to repeat the title of a person in a conversation. This also applied to the use of "Sir", "Madam", "Mr" and "Mrs" but let's see in detail the other rules dictated by the ceremonial in order to avoid accidents etiquette.

A polite Lady should never had to propose topics that may cause of pain or discomfort for those who were present and if, unfortunately, this happened, it wasn't right to interrupt suddenly the speech as soon as she realized, but had to leave the topic gradually yielding perhaps the speech to another person whom she had to try to involve, because it must be remembered that it was considered extremely unfair to be the only protagonists of every speech; etiquette forbade, to be fair, to let terminate the voice that spoke, and even if the argument that was proposed stimulated questions, it was still necessary to wait until the speech was finished to ask them.
It was good practice always to talk with a good tone of voice , but never out loud, finding the right compromise between the scream and the whisper and never use words in French or in Spanish, despite the presence of people who mastered the language:

I heard a lady once use a Spanish quotation; she had mastered that one sentence alone; but a Cuban gentleman, delighted to meet an American who could converse with him in his own tongue, immediately addressed her in Spanish. Embarrassed and ashamed, she was obliged to confess that her knowledge of the language was confined to one quotation. 1




- picture 3 - Hush! (The Concert) - Jacques Joseph (James) Tissot, (1836 - 1902)




It was a good rule to overlook the deficiencies of the others in conversation, never correct them or point out their errors, and, if the confidence allowed it, you could do it later in private, but it was not pointing out the flaws of the others that a Lady showed her wisdom, but rather in the modesty that must reign supreme over all the other rules of life. If, on the other hand, those with whom she conversed used words or expressions difficult to understand was not to hesitate or show shame for her ignorance, but it was only right to ask for an explanation, remembering that you never had to meddle in professional conversations implying specific competencies, which were to be listened in reverent silence.




- picture 4 - In the Conservatory, Jacques Joseph (James) Tissot, (1836 - 1902)




It was considered unpolite to discredit an absent friend or to criticize the clothing or the way of being of a present, it would been sheer pettiness, if he or she enjoyed the admiration of others it  was a good idea to let people retained their view in peace, because to fall in contempt,  at that point, it would not be him, but yourself, appearing of envious and treacherous character; a decent Lady would also avoid to focus her conversation on any subject that might have induced disgust in her audience, for example to get into the detail of certain diseases, pests, noxious plants, or cases of dirt, not only at table, but in any other place, as well as the etiquette strictly condemned the habit of using sentences that admit a double meaning and the discussion about religious topics.




- picture 5 - The Ball on Shipboard, Jacques Joseph (James) Tissot, (1836 - 1902)




Expressing an opinion was to avoid the peremptory and affirm that a thing "it is so", but it was certainly more polite and appreciated to express an opinion saying: "I think this is so", or "these are my opinions "; it was considered a good rule for young Ladies to converse with a Lady they knew, if in the room there were gentlemen, and talk to one of them only in presence of several other Ladies.




- picture 6 - The Dinner Party, Jules-Alexandre Grün (1868 - 1928)




To conclude, to be able to converse appropriately and correctly, Florence Heartley considered it to be necessary to read much, treasuring what was read, to have a quick understanding, observe events that happened at the time, that is, to be updated, and listen carefully whenever the opportunity arose to acquire some knowledge.




- picture 7 - Too Early, Jacques Joseph (James) Tissot, (1836 - 1902)





Finally I quote from page 12 of that prestigious 'HANDBOOK':



"I would establish but one great general rule in conversation, which is this—that people should not talk to please themselves, but those who hear them. This would make them consider whether what they speak be worth hearing; whether there be either wit or sense in what they are about to say; and whether it be adapted to the time when, the place where, and the person to whom, it is spoken."





- picture 8 - Holiday, Jacques Joseph (James) Tissot, (1836 - 1902)





What is certain is that in a society able to follow the rules imposed by the etiquette, mutual respect, good manners, gentleness of character and humility were the rule of the day in everywhere ... and once more I am feeling regret for being born in the wrong century !




- picture 9 - Queen Victoria in Conversation with the Prince and Princess of Wales, Author’s Collection





With warm affection and devotion I thank you sincerely for the support, the enthusiasm and the affection which you increasingly present me as a gift,

see you soon dearest readers and friends 












BIBLIOGRAPHIC SOURCES:

Florence Heartley, The Ladies' Book of Etiquette, and Manual of Politeness -  A Complete Hand Book for the Use of the Lady in Polite SocietyG.W.COTTRELL PUBLISHER, Boston, 1860.



QUOTATIONS:

1 - Florence Heartley, The Ladies' Book of Etiquette, and Manual of Politeness -  A Complete Hand Book for the Use of the Lady in Polite SocietyG.W.COTTRELL PUBLISHER, Boston, 1860, pag. 16.

115 commenti:

  1. In the early 90's these type of Victorian pictures were totally all the rage where we lived in Texas. I still have "The Dinner Party" and love it along with several others. These are really lovely ones!

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. @ Bernideen
      you're so in love with Victorian paintings, aren't you, I do understand what you feel when you watch them, they comunicate such a great deal of sentiments that no one other painting was or is able to do to me, neither before or after the XIXth century.
      I'm so grateful to have the chance of treating this topic with you, I love so much, and, furthermore, this sensitiveness for this kind of art is the prove of the goodness and the delicacy of your heart, sweetest, precious friend of mine, be blessed !

      Enjoy your day and the end of your week ahead, dearie,
      sending blessings and much love to you ❥

      Elimina
  2. Hi Dany! The dresses are so lovely but I think they must have been uncomfortable. I wonder how long it took to get dressed in the morning!

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. @ Gina
      ...in the morning, in the afternoon, in the evening, it was always necessary quite a lot of time for Victorian Ladies to dress themselves ( and to be combed ), and they always needed at least a maid's help, but I think it was so worth !
      And on the other hand they didn't have so many things to do during their days, compared to ours, so it was their ordinary routine, they could spend all the time they wanted and needed in their 'boudoir' !

      My darling friend, I thank you with all my heart for being here, today and always, and with so much love I wish you all the best for the weekend to come, may it be blessed with Joy and Serenity,
      thinking of you ✿⊱╮

      Elimina
  3. It is fun visiting your blog Dany ... It is as if I had visited an Art Gallery. There isn't much of that kind of thing here in our part of Florida, so that makes it a real treat.

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. @ Sallie
      your amusement is mine, is my joy and my pleasure, believe me !

      May the end of your week be filled with love and joy, sweetest, dearest friend of mine,
      sending dear hugs to you across the many miles ಌ•❤•ಌ

      Elimina
  4. So many rules, and yet I think we would be better off today if we still observed a good deal of them ! Your images delight, my friend. I have greatly enJOYed visiting your world today. May your day be filled with all sweetness, my dearest Dany!

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. @ June
      thank you, wonderful friend of mine, for gracing my blog today, you're as a ray of sun shining on my day, your words bless my heart, and your inner joy gives off from all of them as a pleasant scent... I'm so very grateful to you for all this !

      Sending blessings on your day, today, and on the end of your week ahead, dearie, may it be filled with love and with the deepest joy ༺❀༻

      Elimina
  5. Wouldn't it be fun to have just such a conversation with Jane Austen? or George Elliot? I hear that Dr. Johnson was the best conversationalist of all.
    Amalia
    xo

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. @ Amalia
      my beloved friend, of course it would, without any doubt, my darling ... I knew Dr.Johnsons to be indisputably the most distinguished man of letters in English History, but I didn't know anything about his art of talking, thank you for telling me !

      May your weekend be filled with the light of joy and with the warmth of love,
      thinking of you with so much sweetness, dearie ♡ஐ♡

      Elimina
  6. Ciao cara Daniela, grazie per le belle parole che hai lasciato al mio blog che "rimbalzo" a te, dolcissima...GRAZIE, inoltre, perdersi tra i fasti Vittoriani di questo post è cosa "buona". Il romanticismo poetico di quest post è eleganza. Un forte abbraccio e buon w.e. ;) NI

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. @ NI
      amica mia dall'animo gentile e dal cuore animato dai buoni sentimenti dei tempi antichi, sono io ad esserti grata, sempre ... !

      Che il tuo weekend sia colmo di gioia e di letizia, te lo auguro con tutto il cuore ringraziandoti ancora, porti sempre tanta luce e tanto amore con te ♥♡♥

      Elimina
  7. Carissima Dany, direi proprio che la regola generale citata alla fine del tuo bellissimo post sia....indiscutibilmente vera!
    Insomma si tratterebbe "SOLO" di trovare un equilibrio perfetto nell'esporre con garbo e fermezza le proprie opinioni, ascoltando e senza urtare la sensibilità altrui. "Solo"...appunto! :)
    Ma i dipinti che accompagnano il tuo scritto sono favolosi, così ricchi di preziosi dettagli, sembra davvero di essere partecipi ai piacevoli momenti conviviali, ritratti con sapienza e precisione.
    Una meraviglia!
    Grazie e buon fine settimana. cara amica
    Susanna

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. @ Susanna
      grazie a te, dolcissima, amabile amica, è sempre una tale gioia per me averti qui, le tue parole mi accarezzano letteralmente il cuore colmandolo di tanta gaiezza ed appagamento !

      Possa il tuo weekend donarti la contentezza che tu rechi a me con le tue visite, le tue parole, la tua dolcezza, la tua sensibilità, carissima !
      ⊰✽⊱ Ti abbraccio forte forte ⊰✽⊱

      Elimina
  8. Such a different world!!!

    A much more gentle world. Probably never to return. Except in the rare places, where people try to still follow these lovely "Rules".

    And such lovely paintings! Oh so, so, so lovely!

    Gentle hugs,
    Tessa

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. @ Tessa
      you bring such a sweetness when you come here, my darling, thank you, thank you with all my heart !
      You're so right, there are so few places where these rules are still followed ... and how lovely, to stay there it is !

      I hug you with so much heartfelt love, wishing you a most lovely end of your week, sweetest, wonderful friend of mine ღ❀ღ

      Elimina
  9. Hi, Dany. The paintings have a familiarity, but I did not know of Tissot. That last quote is good advice for today. Thank you, for the beauty here. Have a wonderful weekend. xoxo Su

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. @ Su
      what a joy to welcome you here, marvellous friend !
      Your words of appreciation bless my heart, believe me, and I'm so very grateful to you for this, sweetie !

      I wish you a wonderful weekend, darling, filled with joy and wonder, with so much, sincere, thankfulness *♥*

      Elimina
  10. I stand beside you on being born in the wrong century Dany. I found this post to be so interesting, and I wonder why it is that we do not teach considerate conversation. Why have we given up on teaching etiquette to our young people? It is beyond difficult to have a tasteful, heartfelt conversation these days. I find myself with very few friends because of it.
    I so love visiting with you here Dany, and I know that if we were to ever meet, we would have a splendid conversation.
    Love to you,
    Andrea

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. @ Andrea
      if only it were, that one day we could meet, dearest, delicate and so wonderful friend of mine ... your words touched my heart and moved me ... you mean so much to me !
      I do perfectly understand what you mean when you say that today so few people CAN speak, and probably they'll be fewer more and more, because adults have no more time to teach education to young people, and I think it to be so sad ... Etiquette was far precious and I think it's truly lost in the mists of the time, alas !

      Thinking of you with sincere love and admiration, dearest one ♡❤♡

      Elimina
  11. Sono d'accordo con te Daniela, anch'io rimpiango di essere nata in un tempo così diverso. Questo post è una lezione straordinaria di come sarebbe corretta una conversazione. Quanta delicatezza, educazione, tatto, tutte cose che, ahimè, fatico molto, anzi moltissimo, a riscontrare nei giorni nostri. Oggi nessuno sa ascoltare veramente, perchè bisogna emergere, mettersi in mostra.....che tristezza! Daniela grazie infinite per aver dimostrato che, in passato, c'era molta più educazione ed intelligenza, dalle quali si dovrebbe attingere a piene mani per migliorare il presente ed il futuro. Sei magnifica ♥. Paola

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. @ Paola
      mia dolcissima, splendida amica, che piacere e che letizia leggere le tue parole che concordano appieno con le mie, mi si alleggerisce il cuore, davvero ... se oggi le persone fossero ancora in grado di ascoltare, prima di pensare ad imporsi con le parole per esibirsi, penso che, almeno nei rapporti interpersonali, ci sarebbe molto di guadagnato ... e poi il tuo congedo, mia cara, quello mi commuove sinceramente ... sei sempre troppo generosa con me !

      Possa il tuo sabato recarti tanta serenità, dolcissima, ti abbraccio con il cuore colmo di gratitudine e di tanta gioia ༺❀༻

      Elimina
  12. è tutto bellissimo e interessante qui... Sono molto contenta di averti trovata... xxx

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. @ Annalisa
      ... ed io sono felicissima di averti qui, mia nuova amica, ti accolgo con immensa gioia ed un dolce abbraccio !
      Ho provato a caricare il tuo blog ma non mi riesce, probabilmente per i limiti della mia connessione cellulare che sta già facendo fin troppo, povera, se penso che siamo anche sotto una cospicua nevicata con tanto di temporale ... prometto di riprovarci non appena le condizioni atmosferiche e logistiche me lo permetteranno.

      Per ora ti ringrazio qui, con immensa letizia, augurandoti ogni bene per il tuo fine settimana, che l'amore sia con te ❀≼♥≽❀

      Elimina
    2. Cara Daniela,
      è bellissimo leggere la tua dolcezza, specchio di questo tuo spazio virtuale ricco di Bellezza, Storia, Arte e Romanticismo...
      Non so come mai tu non riesca a caricare il mio, spero tanto sia solo un problema temporaneo, perchè pochi giorni fa ho fatto un grandissimo errore tramite google plus, cancellando quasi tutte le immagini salvate... Più di mille... Volevo piangere!
      Adesso sto cercando di recuperare tutto, con un po' di pazienza si puo' fare tutto...!
      Tornerò presto a leggerti, ricambio il calore che mi hai mandato xoxoxo

      Elimina
    3. Che peccato, mia cara, immagino il tuo rammarico ed il tuo rimpianto, talvolta basta una disattenzione .... ma sono certa che con pazienza ed amore riuscirai nel tuo intento ... forse il mio problema a raggiungerti era proprio dovuto a quello, vedevo quasi tutto annullato, come se il blog fosse stato parzialmente cancellato !

      Coraggio cara, ti abbraccio con affetto e ti penso, con simpatia ed affetto, sperando di riuscire di inviarti un po' di conforto, con tutto il cuore ⊰♥⊱

      Elimina
  13. Ciao Daniela,sono passata per un saluto!Da te si sogna sempre!Bacioni!Rosetta

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. @ Rosetta
      mia cara, con tutti i pensieri e gli impegni che hai trovi il tempo per venirmi a salutare, ti ringrazio con il cuore, sei davvero splendida !

      Possa il tuo weekend donarti qualche attimo di pace e di tranquillità, mia dolce, te lo auguro con un forte, sincero ed affettuoso abbraccio ஐღஐ

      Elimina
  14. This was a fabulous post. So much good in those rules of conversation, such as gentleness, thinking of others, etc. I love Tissot and have a Tissot print hanging on my wall. It is the one of a woman sitting in a chair reading the newspaper by the light of the tall window and children around her are playing hide and seek. I think it is called Hide and Seek. I love it and imagine being inside that room. Thank you for this lovely post! Have a wonderful weekend. xo

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. @ Judy
      marvellous friend of mine, I'm so very grateful to you whenever you come and visit me here, and give me the chance to read your so lovely words of appreciation, I thank you with all my heart !

      As for Tissot, his paintings, as you dsay, make you feel inside the image depicted, he was such a talented painter - so very few painters were able to gift this feeling to people watching at their canvases - whom I'm going to dedicate one post of mine during the next months, for sure !

      Sending blessings on the end of your week, admired friend, I thank you again ... and always ಌ•❤•ಌ

      Elimina
  15. Anch' io, come te, penso di essere nata nell' epoca sbagliata. Come vorrei che tanta gente seguisse queste regole basate sul garbo, sull' eleganza, sul rispetto altrui...Ma putroppo, al giorno d' oggi, tutto questo è andato perduto. Per fortuna nel tuo blog si respira sempre aria di altri tempi!
    Bacioni
    Alessandra

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    1. @ Alesandra
      ero certa che anche le tue sarebbero state parole di rimpianto, ormai conosco la gentilezza del tuo animo che non manco mai di apprezzare, mia cara !
      Ti sono grata per le parole con cui concludi il tuo commento, anche tu mi commuovi, dolcissima, facendomi sentire realizzato il sogno che mi ha guidato, quasi tre anni fa, nel dar vita a ~ My little old world ~ che grazie a voi ha cambiato la mia vita.

      Con tutto il mio affetto e la mia ammirazione - e tanta gioia nel cuore - ti auguro ogni bene per il tuo fine settimana ∗⊱༺♡❀♡༻⊰∗

      Elimina
  16. Dear Daniela,
    Few days ago I have discovered your gentle album of memories and history. Congratulations, I feel here all the mildness of the best XIXth century. Specially I love this chapter about etiquette. Much of the beauty of human gestures and treatment is lost with it. How much aristocratic candor! What a religious neatness of shapes and words! I hope you keep on cultivating all those treasures. And, of course, the wonderful paintings. Best wishes.

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Lucilio
      what a joy welcoming a man at ~ My little old world ~, you're so few and for sure enrich my audience, thank you !
      And thank you for your words of enjoyment and of appreciation, touching me in the deep, my friend, I'm truly honoured by what you wrote !

      May your weekend be filled with the deepest joy,
      sending dear hugs and sweet thoughts to you,
      with so much gratitude ❥

      Elimina
  17. I enjoyed this. This is so full of wisdom at which we need to use today. Sadly, I think people have lost the art of communication by conversation. Everything has turned to a text, tweet, or slang.

    I love the Holiday picture. For some reason it just stood out at me. I could stare at it for a long time.

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    1. @ Mrs.Chrissy
      how happy I am to have you here !
      Your beautiful words bless my heart and I'm so very glad also for the amusement which Tissot's painting represented for you, your enjoyment is my joy !

      ⊰♥⊱ Be blessed, sweet friend of mine, enjoy your weekend ⊰♥⊱

      Elimina
  18. Sì, è proprio vero, chi parla molto, ha poche occasioni di ascoltare.
    Ma, ascoltando e ascoltando,per educazione, ci si dimentica un po'della propria voce, come molte volte è capitato a me...
    Ogni azione del nostro vivere quotidiano è improntata sulle regole del galateo, è fondamentale, per vivere in piena armonia con il prossimo.
    Anche se al giorno d'oggi le buone maniere.....
    Grazie mia preziosa amica ,per questa dolce e interessante lettura.
    Qui,si ricrea il mio spirito.
    Ti saluto con tanta ammirazione e ti auguro una serena giornata.
    La tua amica Luci@

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Luci@
      carissima, ammirata amica, ti sono sempre più grata per le parole, così garbate e sempre pertinenti, che scrivi nei tuoi commenti e per il modo grazioso con cui sempre ti poni, sei un dolcissimo dono per me !

      Che la gioia ti sia accanto in questo fine settimana,
      ti abbraccio con il cuore augurandoti con amore tutto il meglio che tu possa desiderare ... sempre ✿⊱╮

      Elimina
  19. che neraviglia queste foto!
    un abbrccaio grande e buon we
    simona

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ simona
      sei sempre la benvenuta con la gioa che porti con te !
      Contraccambio con tutto il cuore il tuo abbraccio per augurarti un weekend colmo di serenità e di letizia, e che il principio della nuova settimana sia all'insegna della gioia più vera per te e per i tuoi cari ಌ❀ಌ

      Elimina
  20. We sure have lost a lot of manners since those days haven't we, to talk because your thinking of the person your talking to and not wanting to hear yourself talk would be a great thing these days.... watching the presidential debates her in America just hurts me to see how they are acting and talking to one another, the people in Victorian times wouldn't believe their ears, so sad.... I have an easy time voicing my opinions in a great of ladies but when it comes to having men too I tend to keep my mouth shut more often, must be I have a little bit of that manner of speaking in me :) Very interesting post once again... Have a wonderful weekend!

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Connie
      what a blessing to have you here, you always bring a ray of sun with you !
      You're such a good hearted and sensitive lady that for sure good manners belong to you without learning anything more, and I'm so grateful to you for being so, sweetest friend of mine, please never change !

      With heartfelt gratitude I wish you a most lovely weekend ever, sending love and smiles to you ♡❤♡

      Elimina
  21. come sarebbe bello se tutti provassero ad osservare queste semplice regole di comportamento...sarebbe veramente un sogno...ti ringrazio per i tuoi post che mi fanno sognare! un abbraccio immenso e l'augurio di una domenica di serenità Lory

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ lory
      dolcissima amica mia, le tue visite sono sempre una grande gioia per me !
      Purtroppo abbiamo, con gli anni, tralasciato di considerare quanto queste, seppur semplici regole, siano importanti ed anzi, fondanti il rispetto per gli altri che non solo governa la conversazione, ma dovrebbe essere alla base di ogni ambito della nostra vita ... uno dei miei tanti rammarichi per il tempo trascorso !

      Certa che avrei trovato rispondenza nella dolcezza e nella delicatezza del tuo animo, ti abbraccio con il cuore augurandoti una splendida domenica, con affetto ed ammirazione sincera *♥*

      Elimina
  22. Carissima Dany, bellissima atmosfera,del tempo in cui mi sarebbe piaciuto vivere ... da Lady, naturalmente!
    Penso che letture di questo genere dovrebbero rientrare nei programmi scolastici, oggi ! : le buone maniere, la cortesia e la

    comprensione , l'arte di vivere in pace con gli altri , oggi sono considerate quasi una sorta di debolezza , di insicurezza ...
    quando invece sono la pietra filosofale che trasforma in oro le relazioni umane.
    Ti auguro una lieta domenica ,
    Franca

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Franca
      il tuo entusiasmo mi allieta e mi rallegra sinceramente il cuore, mia cara !
      Poco, troppo poco probabilmente il tempo che si dedica alle relazioni interpersonali di cui sempre più facciamo a meno, oggi basta una mail od una telefonata per tenere viva una relazione di amicizia od un rapporto formale, per cui tutte queste regole sembrano puro passatismo ... ma a noi mancano, per noi sono di fondamentale importanza, perché il rispetto reciproco è qualcosa di cui non si deve e non si può fare a meno, ... così ci hanno insegnato !

      Con un fortissimo e dolce abbraccio contraccambio il tuo amabile augurio per la giornata di oggi, e che la nuova settimana rechi con sé tanta serenità per te e per i tuoi cari, mia adorabile, stimata amica ༺❀༻

      Elimina
  23. Cara Dany,
    leggerti è come ascoltarti... e chi ti dice che tu non sia vissuta in quel epoca? Chissà? Magari ci conoscevamo pure hehehe
    Un abbraccio e buona domenica

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Woody Woody
      ... chissà, forse sarebbe un modo per giustificare l'amore che nutro per quei tempi e la nostalgia con cui li rivivo ... ti confesso che a volte mi sono trovata a pensarlo anche io !

      Ti mando un grande bacio che ti esprima tutto l'affetto e l'ammirazione che ho per te, deliziosa amica mia, e che la tua domenica scorra all'insegna della gioia più profonda, te lo auguro di vero cuore ಌ•❤•ಌ

      Elimina
  24. This is so interesting, Dany, and the rules were pretty strict, weren't they?
    I always learn so much when I visit you here, sweet friend.
    Thank you for that. xo.

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    1. @ Lisa
      I'm so grateful to you, precious friend of mine, for so many things, first of all for your so big, sweet heart which always brightens my days !

      May your Sunday be blessed with joy, dearie,
      ♡ஐ♡ sending you hugs and love across the Ocean ♡ஐ♡

      Elimina
  25. Dear Sweet Friend, Lovely post and beautiful photos. There is so much to honor in the way and manners when talking to another. Times have changed so much since then, but I do believe kindness still matters!!
    People don't talk enough today face to face where you can see the eyes and understand real emotions. Thank you for sharing.
    You and your history lessons are always so inspiring and knowledge based. So very enjoyable my friend. Have a blessed weekend, xo

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Celestina
      my Lovely, Graceful, Wonderful Lady, your words always bless my heart with such a gladness, I wholeahertedly thank you, for your enjoyment is mine !
      I also think that education is essential and a must when we're talking about interpersonal relationships, and I do agree with you, sweetie, especially when you say that we need to facing people to read their emotions in their eyes, for me it's far important !

      May your Sunday be filled with so many little things which to feel joy for, darling, more I know you and more I appreciate your heart !
      With much gratitude ✿⋰♥♡♥⋱✿

      Elimina
  26. Hello Dany,

    Such gentility and elegance in those days. So many forgotten manners. If only we could practice some of these, I bet people would be a bit more polite and well mannered. The paintings are just delightful to look at. Thank you for the history lesson and for all the beauty you share.

    Hugs from across the pond.

    Janet

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    1. @ Janet
      my sweetest friend !
      I'm living such a busy life, lately and I've all the links of the posts I have to read and comment, amongst which there are yours too, probably you've thought that I forgot you and the love I feel for you, poor darling, lovely friend of mine !
      I'm coming and visit you as soon as I can, I've been missing you and your gentleness so, so much, believe me !

      Enjoy your Sunday, loved friend,
      may it be filled with a lot of joy,
      thinking of you with love and gratitude ⊰✽*✽⊱

      Elimina
  27. Penso che di questi tempi la regola generale citata potrebbe insegnare parecchio a tanta gente: siamo diventati una società cafona, dove il rispetto per il pensiero dell'altro non esiste...e molto ci sarebbe da dire al riguardo. Bella la scelta delle immagini, che osservo con attenzione per trarne ispirazione per le mie donne con cappello. Ciao!

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Marshall
      sono così lieta di averti qui e di leggere le tue parole di approvazione ... davvero i dipinti di Tissot ti ispirano ..., ma allora sei un'artista, ti adoro !

      Con un forte abbraccio ti auguro una nuova settimana all'insegna della serenità, con il cuore ♡❤♡

      Elimina
  28. So nice to read about conversation rules in those days, Dany !
    Interesting post together with lovely photos !
    Hope you're having a wonderful Sunday, sweet friend !
    Hugs,
    Sylvia

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    1. @ Sylvia
      hugs and love to you, my sweetest friend, with much, so much gratitude !
      Hope your week is off to a great start, I wish you a wonderful evening, thinking of you ༺❀༻

      Elimina
  29. Cara Daniela,
    ho molto apprezzato la lettura di questo post. Tralasciando la serenità che mi pervade dalla lettura di ogni tuo intervento, questi aspetti così importanti ma allo stesso tempo così dimenticati di un'apoca passata, mi incuriosiscono sempre molto :)
    Come ogni volta, grazie per aver condiviso con noi queste piccole perle :)
    Beatrice

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Beatrice
      carissima, le tue visite e le tue parole sono un bellissimo dono per me, così prezioso e così tanto stimato, credimi, ti sono immensamente grata per ciò di cui sempre mi fai omaggio, dolcissima amica, mi sei talmente cara !

      Mi stringo a te in un caloroso abbraccio con cui ti auguro una settimana colma di letizia e di tante, piccole cose per cui gioire, con affetto sincero ❥

      Elimina
  30. Dearest Dany,
    If only the rules of etiquette were still followed today! Lovely paintings to illustrate the delicate art of conversation. Wishing you a beautiful week filled with charming and polite discourse.
    Hugs and blessings xo
    Karen

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Karen
      I wonder what a lovely conversation we could have, my Lovely, Dearest Lady !

      May your week be blessed with much love, my bright friend,
      sending dear hugs to you, with so, so much thankfulness ✿⊱╮

      Elimina
  31. Dear Dany, what a lovely post, and so true. I certainly yearn for a more gentle time and more thoughtful conversation. Thankyou. Mimi xxx

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Mimi
      your words truly bless my heart, I thank you so much for the joy you give me, my adorable friend !

      With boundless gratitude I wish you all my best for the new week just begun, with sincere love ⊰♥⊱

      Elimina
  32. a dirla tutta sono regole di buon senso ed educazione che non dovrebbero conoscere tempo, le trovo ancora attuali e a me più o meno tutte le hanno insegnate da bambina, per esempio non interrompere chi parla, non correggere, non parlare di cose che mettono a disagio ecc così come le regole per stare a tavola..
    io penso sempre che in qualche modo esista ancora una parte di società erede di quei tempi, con qualche cambiamento ma a volte riesco a rintracciarla tra le righe a volte, come modo di essere, vestire, la cura di sè, la cura verso gli altri ecc

    un saluto

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Giorgia
      benvenuta a ~ My little old world ~ !
      In realtà dovrebbe essere così, ma è talmente facile ai giorni nostri non essere trattati con le dovute maniere, non solo in quanto a conversazione, ma in svariati ambiti del nostro vivere quotidiano; con ciò, lungi dal me il voler fare una paternale ai miei lettori, ci mancherebbe altro, ho semplicemente tratto spunto da un noto 'manuale' di un'epoca che tanto amo ed in cui cerco di calare chi mi segue, prendendo per mano ciascuno ed 'astraendolo' per qualche istante dai problemi, dai pensieri, dalle preoccupazioni che più o meno ci sono, ahimè, compagne... questa è la filosofia di questo mio blog, nato per fare sognare ad occhi aperti ... chissà che gli eredi di quella società, come dici tu, non siano, almeno in parte, i miei amati followers, ti confesso che spesso mi sono trovata a pensarlo !

      Ringraziandoti sinceramente, ti auguro una settimana serena ♥*♡*♥

      Elimina
  33. These were certainly very different times. When being polite and considerate were a virtue. Thank you so much for sharing Dany. It was very interesting my dear friend.

    Hugs,
    ❤️Ana

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Ana
      your words bless my heart with the deepest joy ever, my darling friend, it's always such a delight to have you here !

      May the remainder of your week be blessed with much gladness, sweetie, sending so dear and heartfelt love to you ಌ•❤•ಌ

      Elimina
  34. We nowadays people have lost the art of conversation! I just read a fantastic novel by Andres Neuman - The traveller of the century. There was a charming Friday cultural club with conversations on politics, literature, society, feminism... It was fascinating to read from customs in the early 1800.
    Thank you dear Dany for this interesting post <3

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ riitta
      I'm always so overjoyed to welcome you, sweetest, precious friend of mine and thank you so much for your advice, i'm going and look for that book, it truly sounds so interesting to me !

      Hoping your week is off to a great start I wish you much serenity for the days to come, sending love to you, with sincere gratitude ❥

      Elimina
  35. Quanto bisogno ci sarebbe adesso di tutte queste regole,
    dove l'importante è solo apparire e farsi sentire, anche
    in maniera volgare....Il Bon Ton sarebbe da insegnare come
    " nuova materia " nelle scuole, ne sono convinta!
    Un altro interessantissimo post, mia dolcissima Dany, corredato
    da bellissimi dipinti.
    Ti abbraccio con molto garbo....e ancora una volta ti ringrazio.
    Love Susy ♥

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Susy
      sono d'accordo con te quanto all'insegnamento di certe regole di buona condotta, la scuola deve essere anche e soprattutto formativa ed educativa, ed oggigiorno dovrebbe compensare le carenze educative dei genitori, perché, diciamolo francamente, le famiglie hanno sempre meno tempo per seguire le nuove generazioni ... non è un bene, ma è una realtà, purtroppo !
      Sentirti oggi mi ha davvero caricato il cuore di buonumore, dolcissima, ed è tutto il giorno che sorrido, da sola, ripensando alle tue parole :D !

      Ti auguro una splendida serata, mio caro 'tesoro vittoriano', e ti abbraccio forte per augurarti un prosieguo di settimana meraviglioso, ci sentiamo presto ♡ஐ♡

      Elimina
  36. Wouldn't it be kind of nice if that bit about not pointing out people's flaws was brought back? Sometimes I feel like people spend more time talking at others instead of conversing with them.

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Heidi
      I welcome you with so much joy, your words put a smile on my face ... actually I think that it would be appropriate and ... wonderful :) !

      Thank you for appreciating this post of mine, my friend,
      sending dear hugs to you ❀≼♥≽❀

      Elimina
  37. Hello Dany,
    This is such a beautiful post. The paintings you have shared are really beautiful, and each one deserves that we take a little time to study all the painter portrayed in it. In The Meeting I was delighted to see that the young lady was keeping her hands busy with needlework. I'm a knitter so I love to see any type of needlework in paintings.
    I love the dream of living in gentler times, and I try to keep my little world as gently as possible. I think we are ambassadors of sorts in a less than genteel generation. :)
    Have a wonderful week!
    Toni

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Toni
      what a delight to read your so beautiful words, my wonderful friend, they really brighten my evening and I'm so grateful to you for them, you're such a marvellous Lady !

      May your day be blessed with much love and joy, and the days to come even more, sweetest friend of mine, sending sincere love to you across the many miles, with esteem ღ*✿*ღ

      Elimina
  38. Tanti auguri,splendida Donna ed amica!
    Luci@

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    1. @ Luci@
      carissima, che sorpresa, contraccambio gli auguri con immensa gioia, sei davvero unica, mia dolcissima, preziosissima amica, sei talmente cara ... che pensiero delicato hai avuto !
      Con immensa stima ti auguro ogni bene per i giorni a venire,
      con tutto, tutto il cuore ♥♡♥

      Elimina
  39. Their attire was so elegant, wasn't it, Dany? I do so wish we had more of this etiquette in our society today. We watched the movie "Becoming Jane" last week and I was taken by the gentleness of the women, even when impassioned they kept their demeanor in check for the most part. I enjoyed this post and the beautiful paintings. I have a book in my antique and vintage collection entitled "Decorum". Have you heard of it? It was published in 1877 by J.A. Ruth & Co and meant to be "a practical treatise on etiquette and dress of the best American society." It actually can be read online: https://archive.org/stream/decorumpractical00ruthrich#page/n0/mode/2up Very interesting. Have a lovely day, my friend. ~ Nancy

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Nancy
      wonderful friend of mine, I love that film and the etiquette they show in their manners, the Regency era was even more strict, as for rules, than the Victorian one, but I find it so pleasant to watch !
      I thank you so much for your words of appreciation and for your kindness, you're really so gentle suggesting me this book, I think it to be so very interesting, and to put here the link to read it on-line, you're truly great, I thank you with all my heart !

      Have a wonderful week, dearie, sending smiles and sweet thoughts to you across the pond, with love ༺❀༻

      Elimina
  40. Hello dear!
    Is an art today that we can develop any conversation and be carefully listened to and to listen without interruption and to use the right words and ways that would accompany our manners, and even our respect, attention and together with the defenrencias good name that everyone deserves in a well-run conversation, but sometimes that does not happen in our world today.
    Sometimes I just transported to this time and pretend to be in the past! Perhaps where morals and manners were important.
    Thanks for your input! Hugs! Rose M.

    RispondiElimina
  41. aniela, mi piace questa atmosfera. Sono una vecchia anima fuori dal tempo! Grazie per queste bellissime foto e tutto ciò che vi contribuiscono, mi si discostano dalla realtà a volte un po 'opprimente! Daniela abbraccia mio caro! Rose M

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Rose
      grazie per entrambi questi commenti e per le bellissime parole che li compongono, mia carissima romantica amica, anche io sono un'anima fuori dal tempo, come dici tu di te stessa, e forse è proprio per questo che ci stimiamo a vicenda, mi sei talmente cara !

      Contraccambio il tuo abbraccio con tutto il cuore e che l'amore ti accompagni per il resto di questa settimana appena cominciata, te lo auguro con tanto, tanto affetto ❥

      Elimina
  42. I think we should remember more of these conversation rules today. It might be much more civil! I am reminded of Downton Abbey, which recently concluded on TV in the US. They had rules and they stuck to them. And it so was much more civilized!

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Jeanie
      I think that the lovely series of Downton Abbey, of which I lost all the episodes of this last year, alas, had so many things to teach us, just about that little bit of etiquette we, nowadays people, have mostly forgotten ... Downton Abbey wasn't only charming and pleasant to watch, but also educative, in my opinion, good manners have no time !

      Sending blessings to you, with so much thankfulness, dearest, sweetest friend of mine ✿⊱╮

      Elimina
  43. Dearest Daniela, this is one of the most interesting and brilliant posts!
    Sincerely, i found it so very enlightening and I have long wondered about the 'rules' of polite conversation in society!
    Thank you so much for a wonderful and educational discourse!
    Best wishes!

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    1. @ Christine
      your words bless and fill my heart, marvellous friend of mine, I wholeheartedly thank you, your words of appreciation brighten my evening, I'd love to have you here to embrace you !

      Sending much love for wishing you a most wonderful week ever, with all my heart and sincere gratitude ♡ஐ♡

      Elimina
  44. By the way, you've introduced me to so many Tissot paintings I wasn't familiar with. I just love his paintings!

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Judy
      ... and I'm far too happy for this too, I hope soon to have the opportunity to dedicate a whole post to his painting, I love him so much !

      Thank you, my darling, again and always *♥*

      Elimina
  45. Dearest friend, how you have been in my thoughts these last few days...how are you? I hope you are having a delightful week thus far :)

    I was quite intrigued by this post, my friend, and while conversing with others during this era seemed tedious I think there is much we can learn and apply to our lives. Our era is losing the ability to converse with others about meaningful things. The idea of respect and dignity seem to be going by the wayside and this breaks my heart.

    Beautiful post, my sweet Dany. You always inspire me. Thank you for sharing your loveliness with Roses of Inspiration. Much love and tender hugs to you!

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    1. @ Stephanie
      it's my pleasure to share my posts with your wonderful link-up party, together with so many lovely and inspiring bloggers, my wonderful friend !
      I'm living such a busy period in my life, I feel so overwhelmed by so many things to do, I'm always running back and forth, and arrive at evening always so out of breath .. I hope this moment is going to its end very soon, believe me !

      Thank you for blessing my blog with your gracious presence and your so loving words, I'm so grateful to you for this, estimated friend of mine, may your day be filled with love and the days to come even more, thinking of you with so much tenderness ಌ❀ಌ

      Elimina
  46. DANY! BONJOUR! Now I think your post is a poem in itself. Poetry shows us the world in a different way, a way that has been forgotten perhaps. I so wish that conversation these days was a little more like this, intended to be a two-way activity of grace. Oh how language changes with the times, and I like this for so many reasons. What a beautiful post, and thank you so much for coming to visit my post! Much love to you and blessings of joy to you! Anita

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    1. @ Anita
      after reading your so wonderful comment, well, I feel so touched and ... speechless ... you're a poet, I know, and your words are always so very beautiful, but if you're talking with such words of a post of mine, well, I feel moved !
      Your visits here are always a so gracious and precious Gift, you mean so, so much to me, I do admire you such a lot and appreciate everything you do and say, blessed be !

      Enjoy the remainder of your week, my Lovely Lady, may it donate you plenty of Joy and Wonder, sending you love and dear hugs, with boundless gratitude ⊰✽♥♡♥✽⊱

      Elimina
  47. So many only listen just enough to start pondering what their answer will be. Listening for the pure joy of listening, I think has become sort of a lost art.

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    1. @ Terri
      I think that most of what during the Victorian age was considered etiquette, and so of duty bound towards the others, has become a lost art, as you so nicely defines it ...

      I'm always so grateful to have you here, with your lovely words and your grace, sweet friend,
      sending love to you for wishing you beautiful days to come ∗⊱༺♡❀♡༻⊰∗

      Elimina
  48. Daniela, I have a great love of the Victorian era and finding out new customs that I did not know about. The art is so beautiful and always tells such a magnificent story..Your blog is beautiful..Happy Wednesday..Judy

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Judy
      your beautiful words makes my day and fill my heart, I thank you most sincerely, new friend of mine, and I must say that I'm so happy to see that you also are so in love with the Victorian age, my Love Lady !

      I wish you too a joyous day, with love ❥

      Elimina
  49. Hello again, Dany!

    How wonderful to see so many comments on your magnificent blog! You really do the best research and find the most interesting subjects, so it not a surprise that many are finding your blog. I was thinking about how important polite conversation was in old times before the distractions we have today of radio, television and the computer and cell phones. I sometimes believe that no one knows how to converse any longer. It is a lost art!

    I wish I could visit you every day, not to miss one of your posts, but I am happy to see the ones I do and enjoy catching up at one time when I have a quiet and free evening. My days are so busy with babysitting grandchildren these days!

    Hugs,

    Pat

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Pat
      you're such a good hearted lady, my wonderful friend, and I'm always in high spirits when I read your comment, so I'd also love so much to have you always here, your comments are always so inspiring and so clever and it enthralls me to read them, but of course, our life comes before than everything, especially grandchildren, they're the biggest joy for a woman, I think !

      As for the topic of this post of mine, this is a lost art, you're true, but I'm so sure that still belongs to you, dearie !

      Sending you blessings of joy, my sweetest one, feel free to come when you can, and be sure, I'm welcoming you with such a gladness ... every time you'll be visiting !
      Thinking of you with so much love and thankfulness ♥∗✿≫✿≪✿∗♥

      Elimina
  50. What a delight to stroll through your art gallery, Dany, with the beautiful music softly playing in the background. It has been a delight to read of the etiquette and the art of conversation of a bygone era. It is a pity we are so rushed these days to consider such important matters. I believe our modern world could learn many a thing from the Victorian era.

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Kim
      I'm always so overjoyed to welcome you, my Marvellous Lady, and ... you know, I also think that nowadays rhythm and culture has made us lose such a lot ...
      I'm so thankful to have you here, your words of appreciation bless my heart with a so deep joy, sweetest friend of mine !

      Hope you're having a great week so far, dearie,
      sending love, hugs and sweet thoughts to you while wishing all my best for your days to come ಌ❀ಌ

      Elimina
  51. Anche se il mondo di oggi ha perso tutte le buone maniere dell'epoca vittoriana, credo che tenere a mente questi insegnamenti sia comunque ancora importante: quanto ancora possono insegnarci!

    ;-)

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Silvia
      mia dolcissma amica, può sembrare strano, ma talvolta il passato conserva ancora qualcosa da insegnarci, soprattutto in quanto ad educazione e a rispetto reciproco, che non sono mai abbastanza e mai ci farebbero sfigurare, credimi !

      Ti auguro una magnifica serata ed un sereno prosieguo di settimana, ringraziandoti con tutto il cuore ♡❤♡

      Elimina
  52. Dany, I love this post, both for the paintings and the subject of etiquette. It has been a lifelong interest of mine, and I've written many magazine articles on the subject over the years. It's wonderful the way you find these things and share them with us all!

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Jean
      I'm so grateful to you for your words of appreciation, marvellous friend, also according to the special interest you had and have in this topic, I'm truly honored and overjoyed by your comment, you really make my day !

      Hope your week is off to a great start, I wish you so lovely days to come, with all my heart ❀≼♥≽❀

      Elimina
  53. Dearest friend, I wanted to feature this wonderful post at Roses of Inspiration tomorrow, but I am unable to share any of the photos on my blog. Is there any way you could email me a picture from this post so that I can add it to the party?

    Much love to you, my friend!

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Stephanie
      as soon as I read this comment of yours, yesterday evening, I sent you an e-mail with all the pictures published here, so you can choose the one you do prefer ... I sincerely hope I've arrived in time for the post you're preparing, to be featured at Roses of Inspiration is such a great joy and honour to me, my darling ... let me know !

      Sending blessings on your day,
      with so much thankfulness ღ✿*✿ღ

      Elimina
  54. Good Morning Dear Friend,
    You must know that visiting you is one of my special treats to begin my day.
    I sit here with my favorite cup of coffee or tea.
    I cannot believe it has taken me this long to meet you!
    Oh, how I long for a world that was once so gentle, caring, kind and thoughtful of one another.
    We must practice these courtesies and manners as much as we are able to and pass them on to family young and old.
    Wishing you a beautiful and gentle day.
    Blessings,
    Jemma

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Jemma
      you're such a blessing to me, your words fill my heart and your compliment leave me speechless ...
      That would be a better world, I think, if not everything had gone lost, as you say, teaching these manners to young generations, first of all, thing that we should begin to do inside our classrooms, as I wrote up above ... As a teacher, making a general argument, Italian students are so rude, belive me, I'm sure that in the States they're much more well-bred, and if they're so inside scools, they're so everywhere, or maybe worse ... just for say, once happened that in my classroom, they made a battle with oranges during a lesson, and trying to stop them, I was hit by an orange on my left shoulder, and nobody apologized for this {{smiles}} ! ! !
      Thank you for your gentleness, warming my heart in this so cold evening of ours, I'm sending so much blessings of joy to you,
      with so much thankfulness ಌ•❤•ಌ

      Elimina
  55. Hello Dani...I'm visiting from Roses of Inspiration. What a lovely post this with these lovely images (and music) and such interesting information! Oh to be a fly on the wall back in those days and hear all of the lovely conversations! I love the Victorian era!

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Debby
      I welcome you with so much joy, my new friend, so overjoyed to have in you another admirer of the Victorian times, and thanks to the wonderful Stephanie, I love her so much !

      Have a lovely remainder of your day,
      sending hugs across the many miles ❥

      Elimina
  56. I just discovered this web-site,thanks to The Enchanting Rose. What a lovely site you have and I enjoyed it tremendously.
    Thanks for the beauty of this site. I will be comming back her ea lot.
    Marilyn

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Marilyn
      I'm delighted to welcome you, new friend of mine, your words fill my heart with gladness, thank you so, so much !
      Just come back here whenever you wish, you'll be always a gift to me !

      May the remainder of your week be joyful,
      ღ with gratitude ღ

      Elimina
  57. Such an beautiful post that touches on a subject that this generation really needs to address! In this age of electronic communication, the art of communicating effectively is certainly being lost. As I gazed upon the beautiful pictures you shared, I could imagine myself in such a setting... holding a cup of tea, and engaging in stimulating conversation... thank you Dany for sharing such vivid and stimulating posts... I will think on this often, and work on making conversation a more beautiful thing, both by talking and listening. Blessings to you today!

    RispondiElimina
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    1. @ Marilyn
      sweetest friend of mine, what a blessing to have you here ... and your words, your words fill my heart and brighten my evening, darling, thank you both for visiting, and for appreciating this topic !

      I wish you a most wonderful week ahead,
      sending love to you, with much, so much gratitude ❥

      Elimina

I WHOLEHEARTEDLY THANK YOU FOR YOUR THOUGHTS AND WORDS, SO PRECIOUS TO ME.